Hurricane Chemo Officially Makes Landfall...

Well today is Sunday and we entered the ER after struggling all weekend with, "do we take her in or not?"...ugh.

Liv didn't go to school at all Tuesday.  On Wednesday (she got her watch back btw as it was our time again) she messaged me from school saying she felt sick.  I picked her up early.  Same thing Thursday- she just wasn't feeling herself- very tired and I knew this next round was going to knock her down flat.  Having been only 7 days after her 'big dose' last week I expected her to not feel great but never expected the weekend we were about to have.

Back to Friday though... to be honest, Liv had a lot of emotions and stress about where she would get to stay after chemo.  This added to her anxiety big time and when she gets this way she just wants one person... so DaddyMax just held her until it was time.

Port access went... sort of smooth. Still lots and lots of tears but she was brave overall. This visit was just the one med, Vincristine, and we were in and out in just over two hours.

Ultimately we were aloud to bring live home.  About half way home my worse nightmare came true, Blu started heaving and almost hysterically started vomitting out of her mouth and nose.  It just so happens that I have the worlds worst gag reflex and it was all I could do just to keep it together and not puke right along with her.  It was really touch and go there for a minute!  Max pulled over the car and, knowing how sensitive I am to even the sound of gaging, he ordered me out as he took over while she finished.  I had used a pair of shorts and her jacket to clean her off between throwups and wanted to just chuck it all in the bushes but Liv wanted to keep them so I put it all in the very back of the car.  We made it home without more vomit.

Once home and in bed I had hoped we were past the worst.  But after the stress, the vomit, the ride home... she was on fire.  The reality is that it all adds up and it just absolutely worked her.  We got her inside, cleaned her up, and got her settled in the cool AC to lie down.  The standard routine post-chemo has been that she feels bad at first but then she pulls out of it.  Unfortunately this time she never actually got better.  At all.  She refused to eat anything (and trust me, like her mama you can't force her to do anything that she doesn't want to do).  We tried everything under the sun... healthy things, not healthy things, milkshakes, popsicles, juice, graham crackers with almond milk (which she normally loves) but nothing sounded good and she got more and more pale.

Her temp would rise and just as we would agree to take her in we would take her temp one last time just to be sure it was necessary and the fever had fallen under the "go" line of 101.  So, we'd get her as comfortable as possible and just snuggled up to a movie.  Then the next hour she would sleep and wake warm and we would questions ourselves all over again.  The challenge is, as explained by our Oncologist, if you bring her in for any reason it will usually be a very very long process however if you come in fevered it almost certainly means 3 days of IV antibiotics as an in patient.  They had told us that even if they don't know for sure that she has an infection, it's a standard 3-day stay.  So they told us to make absolutely certain she's running and maintaining a fever.

I had called her doc on Saturday with my concerns and explained the wide range of the temperature readings we were getting and he agreed that we should keep watching it and see what happened.  So we took the doctors orders, made her as comfortable as possible, and waited.

Today we made the call.  She woke from a long nap and was just too hot.  We got her in the car, grabbed Larry the Lobster, her puke bucket, tossed in some clothes for us, a few toiletries, and headed to Rady's.

Her port was accessed super quick (thank you nurse Ramon- by far the easiest access ever) and blood work was drawn for labs.

Note Max's attempt at humor & a Yamaka 

They wanted an X-ray, to rule out any stomach or intestinal twisting from the vomiting, as well as an Ultrasound & CT Scan to look more closely at the liver.  This meant round two of the overnights here at Rady's.  Max and I both without thinking looked at each other and said, "guess we are going home... to the Oncology wing!"  Back again!

X-ray

Ultrasound

CT Scan

Max has a new favorite motto; one hour at a time.  Things have been so heavy, and emotional, and just plain ridiculous that even trying to focus on one day at a time is just too much.  Right now we're just trying to get to the next hour unscathed.  Each hour that passes without have something overwhelming happen is a good hour LOL!  So far we've strung several good hours together despite our current sleeping arrangements of the hospital couch and a pad on the floor :)

Liv is getting IV antibiotics and they've given her some morphine to ease her pain and let her rest.

We just got news that the X-Ray and Ultrasound came back clear but the CT Scan won't be seen by the Radiologist until tomorrow.  That said, one of her Oncologists did review the scan and the early thoughts are that Blu has a "liver injury" due to the Dactinomycin she gets during her "big dose."  This is a somewhat common side effect for some kids who don't process the Dactinomycin properly.  This isn't officially the issue but all signs are pointing in that direction.  This will ultimately mean an adjustment in the dosage moving forward.

So, for now, we've set up base camp once again here on Mt. Cancer Sucks.  We're tired but we're together.  We're missing Jet but he knows we're thinking of him constantly and are working hard to get our FamBam healthy and back together again as soon as possible.

Hopefully we an get an update out sometime late tomorrow once we know more.  Once again, thank you for your ceaseless love and support.  You all give us so much strength!

Max & Carlie